So, once again I have forgotten about my blog! LOL! I guess Blogsgiving did me in, and I couldn't even make it a whole month. Lesson learned, no more Blogsgiving!
I'm fully aware that I probably spend too much time on Facebook. I scroll and scroll trying to keep up with my friends and what's going on in their lives. Multiple times a week I tell myself that I should delete the app, however I can never bring myself to do it, it's how I keep up with everyone currently and in the past.
My favorite thing is looking at my memories. So many things show up that I either forget about or can't remember what the heck I was talking about! It is a great way to remember what I've done in the past, good or bad!
These last 3 -4 weeks, I've teared up almost daily reading my memories. Anyone who knows me and my family know that October 2014-October 2015 were rough times, specifically May and June 2015. As time goes on, memories become more distant, sometimes I'm not sure if reliving those memories yearly are good or not, but I'm leaning more toward good.
These memories make me cry happy tears. These memories are a reminder of God's goodness. Specifically seeing the post from my sister pleading for prayers for Claire as she is being pumped full of steroids to restore her vision and then again two days later with an update that Claire's vision is 20/20 again. So many emotions flood through me as I read all of these post from three years ago. These post of hundreds of people from all of the country praying for Claire and standing with us as we prayed and believed for complete healing in her body, from her eyes, to her ears, to each additional procedure she endured. God's love was shown daily. Those memories are no fun, but the reminder of Gods healing is amazing.
Today I'm reminded of the love shown to me from my friends during this time. I remember sitting at Amico's with my friends for our "Bonnaroo" meeting and leaving there having no clue what was discussed. I can't remember if Claire was still in the hospital or at home at this point, but I literally left there knowing less about our plans than I did before I got there. For a month or two before Bonnaroo, I contemplated selling my ticket, no sure why at the time, but the reason making itself clear later on. So much was on my mind at this time, that Bonnaroo was the last thing I was thinking about.
Claire came home from the hospital on Wednesday, June 3rd, on the following Wednesday, June 10th, I had my interview at TennCare, which I would get. I left there and headed to Krogers to grab my Bonnaroo groceries. As I had a cart full of groceries, I get the phone call saying that the family is gathering at the nursing home with Grandma Vernon because they weren't sure if she'd make it through the night. I was standing in the middle of Kroger's with a grocery cart full of food not sure if I should put it all back or buy it. I went ahead and checked out, went to Shelby's, left my food in her fridge, and we busted tail to Franklin. Grandma passed away about an hour after Shelby and I got there. I saw my Grandma almost daily for the majority of my life, and no matter how prepared I was, it was still a lot of sadness.
My Bonnaroo got postponed obviously! I was on the fence if I would go or not, but Thursday I met up with my friends and left them my camping gear, just in case I decided to come up and meet them. I ended up going Saturday afternoon after Grandma's funeral. I got there, and I was almost in a panic attack, I think everything hit me and I was tired, worn out, and just plain sad.
Today's memory reminded me of how awesome my friends were. Today's memory was a picture of my tent set up and air mattress blown up and made up with my sheets and blankets. Seems like a small gesture, but for anyone who's been to Bonnaroo, you know how hot it can be and no one likes setting up the camp, but my friends took the extra time to set up my tent so I had a place to sleep and wouldn't have to do it when I got there, even though I wasn't sure if I was actually going or not until Saturday morning.
I can't tell you who I saw at Bonnaroo that year, I really can't tell you much about my life from May-August, it's really just a blur. What I do remember is receiving hugs from my friends as I arrived. I remember just wanting to sit down when I got there, everything hitting me and on the verge of tears as they unloaded my car for me and let me just sit there. They helped me laugh and joked with me to help me feel some sense of normalcy for a few days. For my 2015 Mermaid River group, thank you!
So, to Facebook, thanks for the memories, the good, the bad, and the ugly. But mostly, thank you for reminding me of God's love!
